The Empress's New Groove
by Soulfire
Summary: It's time for Kuzco to choose his bride. Yzma has a plan to get herself back on the throne by using her grandaughter, Tetzu. However, Tetzu has plans of her own.
1. Chapter One

Empress's New Groove  
  
  
  
All Emperor's New Groove stuff belongs to Disney . . . yada, yada, yada. Tetzu's mine - don't use her without my permission or she'll turn you into a frog. :)   
  
  
A woman dressed in royal robes entered the throne room, glancing around cautiously. Looking to make sure she was alone, she quietly lowered herself into the Emperor's throne. However, no sooner had she sat down, than a rotten egg collided with the top of her head, followed by snickering from above.  
"Kuzco!" the young woman shrieked. Her head snapped up and she glared at the Emperor. He was sitting on the top of the massive throne, grinning from ear to ear.  
"Good morning, Tetzu," he smirked.   
Tetzu wiped the smelly goo from her head and stood. After giving him another good glare, she picked up a pillow from his throne and chucked it at him. It hit him in the face, knocking him backwards, off the throne.   
Kuzco landed on the floor with a loud, "Oooof." There was a short pause and then the Emperor started to whine. "Owwww! No touchie."  
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KUZCO: Hold it! I know what you're thinking - no, Tetzu's not my sister. She's something much worse. She's my wife. Yeah, I know. "Ewww," right? Hey, it's not like I had a choice. Remember how before that whole llama incident I was supposed to choose a bride? Well, the 'thing that never shuts up' came back and made me choose. I'll never trust 'Ennie-meenie-miney-mo' again. Look what it got me stuck with - a bratty little Empress. It's an interesting story how it all happened. So sit back, relax, grab some popcorn and listen how I got into this mess.  
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A young girl dressed in a purple pancho squinted at the label of a glass vile she held in her hand. Seeing it was the one she had been looking for, the she poured a drop of it into another vile that was filled with a bluish liquid. The girl pulled out a bird from the birdcage sitting on the table in front of her and forced it to drink a drop of the potion she had just mixed. The bird disappeared in a puff of smoke and in its place stood a monkey.  
"I'm getting closer, grandma," the girl called into the darkness behind her.  
"How many times do I have to tell you, Tetzu?" A white cat stalked over to the girl. "Don't call me grandma. It makes me sound so . . . old." The cat shuddered.  
Tetzu sighed. "I'm sorry, Yzma."  
The former advisor eyed the monkey that had been a bird moments before. "Yes, you are making progress, child. Keep working at it. I have confidence that you will find the right formula soon, and then I'll be able to become human again."  
"And take your revenge on Kuzco," Tetzu recited. She brushed a strand of her black hair away from her face. "This revenge thing is taking an awfully long time. It's all ready been a year since the llama incident."  
"And a year that I've been stuck in this humiliating cat body," Yzma hissed, pounding one of her forepaws on the ground. "But I'll be human again soon, and then Kuzco will be dead."  
Tetzu set down the vial that she was holding and glanced at the door. "We're getting low on several of the ingredients that I'll need to keep working on that human potion. I'm going to go out and see if I can find some."   
The white cat nodded as her granddaughter picked up a small basket in the corner. "See that you hurry back. I want you working on that potion again as soon as possible!" Flicking her tail in the air, Yzma turned and scampered back into the shadows of the small room.  
Letting the pleasant smile fade from her face, Tetzu smirked in the direction Yzma had gone. "Yes, grandmother, I'll have you turned into a human in no time. Then once you get rid of Emperor Kuzco and take over the throne, I'll be next in line." She chuckled. "It shouldn't be too hard to poison you as well and take the throne from you." Her purple pancho flapped in the gentle breeze as she opened the door to go outside. "Empress Teztu. I like the sound of that." Her laughter echoed throughout the room until she shut the door behind her.   
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"What?!" Kuzco's voice resounded loudly.  
Yzma quietly inched closer so she could hear the young Emperor's conversation with the advisor. Finding a suitable place in the shadows beside the throne, she crouched down and peered over at the two people.  
"I'm sorry, Emperor Kuzco, but a law is a law," the advisor was saying.  
"Well, I'm in charge here, and I say we do away with that law."  
"You can't do that, sire. If you were to change it, it would not go into effect until your children were the rulers."  
The Emperor folded his arms across his chest and appeared to pout.   
"There is no way around it. You must choose a bride before your next birthday, or I will have to choose one for you."  
"But my birthday is in two days!" Kuzco protested.   
The advisor did not seem to care. "You must choose that before that night, your highness."  
Letting out a growl of frustration, the Emperor stalked out of the throne room with the advisor close behind.  
Yzma grinned. "This is purrrrfect." Her tail twitched as a plan started forming in her head. Glancing around to make sure no one was watching, she scampered out of the room. She reached her "new" secret lab and made her way outside to track down her granddaughter. "Tetzu?" she called breathlessly. "Tetzu!"  
The girl, who had been pulling up a purple blossom, looked up from her work. "Yes?"  
The white cat scrambled up beside her and motioned for Tetzu to follow her back to the lab. "The perfect opportunity has presented itself. We have to act quickly."  
Tetzu nodded and followed the cat's lead. "You have a plan?"  
"Yes, and they involve you becoming Empress." As they entered the lab,Yzma glanced back and smirked at the stunned expression on her granddaughter's face.  
"Empress?"  
"Kuzco is being forced to pick a bride before his next birthday, which is in two days. We will make sure he picks you." Yzma turned her attention to the many potions displayed in the cabinet on the lab wall as she continued to explain. "After he trusts you, you will poison him and take control of the kingdom." She paused to smirk at Tetzu. "And you will make me your advisor of course."  
"Of course." Tetzu nodded her approval. "It's a perfect plan, but how do we make sure the Emperor chooses me for a bride?"  
"Just leave that to me, dear" Yzma purred. "You just go get yourself cleaned up." 


	2. Chapter Two

The small room echoed with the excited chatter of the young women as they dressed. Tonight the Emperor would choose his bride and it would be one of the ten girls standing in that room. They had all been picked as the best the kingdom had to offer - all except one. In the corner of the room, a young girl was bound and gaged, dressed in nothing but her undergarments. Two figures occupied her spot in the room. br  
"Aren't you ready yet?"br  
Tetzu sighed from behind the red curtain. "I look rediculous."br  
"I'm sure you look fine," Yzma replied. "Come out and let me have a look."br  
The curtain pulled back and Tetzu stepped out. The white dress fit loosely around her small figure and the gold armbands insisted on sliding down to her wrists. Her gold earings were much too large for her, pulling her ears down under their weight, while her shaggy black hair refused to stay in a neat bun. br  
Yzma blinked. "You look rediculous." She shook her head and turned away to glance at the other women being prepared for the bride-choosing ceremony that would take place in a few minutes. "Nevermind. It doesn't matter. Kuzco will pick you."br  
Sighing, the young girl pulled her hair out of the bun, letting it fall down her back. "How can you be so sure? I'm nothing compared to the other girls that are competing for this position."br  
"You are right. You have one thing they don't."br  
"An evil plan to kill the Emperor?"br  
"Okay, you have two things," Yzma retorted. "You have that and a brain."br  
"What good is a brain going to do me when the Emperor chooses? He's not going to look for the smartest; he's going to look for the prettiest."br  
"Just try to fix yourself up as much as you can. I'll handle the rest."br  
A older man entered the room and clapped his hands to get the girls' attention. "It's time, ladies. It's time to see the Emperor. Line up, single-file."br  
As the advisor concentrated on organizing the group of excited girls, Tetzu took off her gold armbands. Noticing the golden cord that held a curtain back, she untied it from the curtain and tied it around her waist. After a quick glance in the mirror, she took off her cumbersome earrings and tossed them onto the floor. It was better she look plain than rediculous. br  
The advisor hurried the girls out of the room and down the hall to the throne room. The girls' anxious wispers died out and the whole room became silent as they watched Kuzco sitting on his throne. He had a pained expression on his face, like he was being fourced to do some unpleasent chore.br  
With a sigh, the Emperor stood and aproached the line of ten girls. He glanced over them all, his gaze not staying on any girl for longer than the others. After a brief pause, he turned to his advisor. "They all look the same."br  
"You have to pick, your highness."br  
The Emporor glared at the line of girls. "Fine." Closing his eyes and covering them with his hand, he pointed at each girl in turn as he chanted,"Ennie-meenie miney mo, catch a tiger by the toe. If he hollers, let him go. Ennie-meenie miney mo." Tetzu gasped - he was pointing to girl beside her! br  
Suddenly something fell from above and landed on the chosen girl's head. The girl shriked and fell back as a white ball of fluff clawed at her face. Taking the opportunity, Tetzu used her foot to shove the girl to the side, and took her place in the line. When Kuzco opened his eyes, he was pointing straight at Tetzu. br  
"Okay, you - you're the Empress. Come on, let's go get the wedding ceremony over with." He turned and stalked out of the room, leaving Tetzu with the advisor. As she was lead out of the room, she glanced back at the girl on her knees, sobbing in dispair. The new Empress turned away after smiling at the white Persian cat grooming herself in the shadows. P   
  
As soon as Tetzu left the throne room, the advisor grabbed her wrist and hurried her into another room. "Change into your new clothes in here," he said, motioning to the clothing folded neatly on an enormous bed. "Don't forget the crown." He nodded to a exact replica of the crown the emperor wore. br  
Tetzu groaned as the man left. "I hate that hat." The clothes that had been layed out for her fit slightly better than the ones she had been wearing before. She hated being so scrawny. A knock on the door told her that she needed to hurry. After setting the heavy crown on her head, she pulled open the door and alowed herself to be led to the throne room again.br  
The rejected girls had been ushered out of the palace. Kuzco stood impatiently tapping his foot as the servent led Tetzu inside.   
Kuzco's advisor raised an eyebrow at the girl before him, but went on with the ceremony. After chanting a few prayers to the sun god, the advisor motioned for a small group of servants to aproach them. "To finalize this sacred bond, you both must recieve the mark of the bonded."br  
The Emperor looked around, confused. "The what of the who?" br  
"A simple tatto, your highness."br  
Kuzco paled a few shades as a servant held up a tatooing needle. "Can't we just get matching earrings or something?"br  
"I'm afraid not."br  
The servents gathered around the couple and started their task. The rest of the evening the palace was filled with screaches of pain and shouting of "No touchie!" P  
  
  
That night, Tetzu was led down the hall towards the Emperor's room. They had been separated after the tatooing process because the Emperor had passed out in the middle of it. He had been taken to his room with a half-finished golden band around his upper arm. Tetzu absently rubed at her own golden-banded arm. It was swollen and tender from the needles that had been so harshly jabbed into it. At least she remained conscious for the whole ordeal. br  
When she arrived at the Emperor's door, the servant who had escourted her left her to enter by herself. With a gentle knock on the door, Tetzu pushed it open. Kuzco lay awake on his bed. He cradled his half-tatooed arm, as he watched her come in.br  
"They are going to finish your tatoo in the morning," Tetzu stated as she entered and shut the door behind her.br  
"Great."br  
"So," She sat herself down in the large, cushioned chair in the cornor of the room. "I guess we're married."br  
Kuzco frowned. "Yeah, well, don't get too excited. I didn't want to get married or anything." He pulled the thick blanket up to his neck and settled down to go to sleep.br  
Sighing, Tetzu followed his example by making herself comfortable in the chair. In the silence of the night, the couple drifted off to sleep, unaware of a white cat watching them from the corner of the room.P 


End file.
